Ask the Architect

Certificates of Occupancy, Part II

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Q. We have a difficult situation and need advice. We bought a house 12 years ago and now want to sell, but our bank wants a certificate of occupancy, and we have some items, such as a deck and pool, that need a C.O. Our city says we have to get a permit for not just the deck and pool but also some inside walls we removed and a plumbing permit for our washing machine. Then they told us we need to apply for a variance for our garage, which was made smaller to make a laundry. We don’t mind parking our car on the street, so why is this necessary now? We just want to sell. How long could this take, and aren’t we grandfathered in, since the walls we removed were all taken care of with beams our contractor put in? This is all so complicated!

A. As I wrote last week, there’s a segment of our population that always makes me wonder. When I reach an intersection with a four-way stop sign, should I just drive right through? Should I slow down, check to see if everyone else stopped, and then just keep going? A client with a similar problem smiled sheepishly and told me he’d “rather ask for forgiveness than ask for permission.”

Permits came about because someone — actually a large group of reactionaries — decided we needed rules to protect the unwary from one another. As the city of Chicago burned, two people fleeing the heat and flames must have said to each other, as they took turns dunking their smoldering hair in Lake Michigan (historical fact), “Y’know, there oughta be a law.” Just because you buy a home “that way,” or your contractor said he got permits (and was lying, because there are no laws protecting you from him), or the work is old enough to forget doesn’t make it acceptable.

It leads us back to the lawless days that led to the Chicago fire. People a mile away from Mrs. O’Leary’s cow, or the kicked-over oil lantern of legend that started the fire, must have felt like victims, not free Americans. Your washing machine can spew waste into our drinking water supply, your garage conversion can put another car on our crowded streets, your deck can become a death trap for unwary barbecue attendees when it collapses, and your pool can be the place where a 2-year-old takes her last breath. Every summer the news of some sad, preventable occurrences lead people to turn to one another and say, “Y’know, there oughta be a law.”

It takes several months to get the permits you need if you also need a zoning variance, but it’s required. That’s why contractors and homeowners ignore the requirement. I, too, wish it didn’t take so long, because it encourages people to break the law, hurting us all.

© 2016 Monte Leeper. Readers are encouraged to send questions to yourhousedr@aol.com, with “Herald question” in the subject line, or to Herald Homes, 2 Endo Blvd., Garden City, NY 11530, Attn: Monte Leeper, architect.