Hell's bells, Pavlov's theory rings true

The first sound I heard this morning was my nerve-jangling alarm clock, waking me from a sweet slumber and reminding me that I had to teach a class in an hour. The alarm noise was so jarring that Zoe the dog blasted out of bed as if propelled by a rocket. I was slightly less enthusiastic.

I loathe the alarm clock. When I stopped working full time, I embraced the idea that I would never have to set an alarm again. But I still use the clock, quite often, for work and doctors’ appointments and travel. When the alarm rings, my heart races, some kind of fight-or-flight response. I get dragged unwillingly into my day, just like the rest of us.

I realized today that much of our behavior in modern America is governed by bells of one sort or another. And I realized that most of us have unconsciously become complicit subjects in a Pavlovian world. You remember Ivan Pavlov, the behavioral psychologist who demonstrated that if you ring a bell when it’s time to feed the dog, eventually the dog will salivate at the sound of the bell? That’s a conditioned response to a specific stimulus.

Lest anyone question the power of conditioned behavior, Pavlov’s research was eventually used in the development of brainwashing, implanted memories and other psychological warfare techniques. Think “Manchurian Candidate.”

A more accessible reference is the Catskills hotels of my youth. When the dinner bell rang, hungry or not, hordes of old Jewish people shuffled along toward the buffet.

“But I’m not hungry,” I would protest.

“And what does that have to do with it?” my grandma would say.

If you prefer a more universal example, tap a poodle on the behind and she sits. Then give her a biscuit. Do it 20 times and she’s learned to sit by reinforcing the cue and the behavior. What does that mean for us? Alas, we have all become trained poodles.

We jump out of bed at the alarm. In the kitchen, I turn on the coffee machine and put a bowl of oatmeal in the microwave. In a few minutes the Mr. Coffee beeps and I respond to the call, grabbing the pot and filling my cup.