Teaching respect and responsibility

I would name him as the most influential teacher of my entire life, and it's not even close. I feel deeply privileged and honored to be able to call myself his student. I will always be his student throughout my life.”

Thomas Osborne

Sensei Jeff Lovering is concerned with what he sees as a severe lack of role models for young people. In response, the martial arts instructor, and former Bellmore Chamber of Commerce president, does what he has done for 33 years: He offers instruction to students of all ages in the Bellmore-Merrick community at Goshinkan Dojo, on Merrick Avenue in Merrick.

When one enters his dojo –– Japanese for a room where martial arts are practiced –– one must behave with respect, for oneself and everyone else, Lovering said. Until 2005, when he moved it to Merrick, his dojo was in Bellmore.

“Kids are using as role models these sports figures who are making millions and think they can do whatever they wish … just because they’re so good at what they do,” said Lovering, 63, a former Bellmore resident who now lives in Farmingdale. “My role models, like Mickey Mantle … were all class acts. Maybe they did their own thing, but in the public eye they were all gentlemen.”

“Out there, there’re no manners, but in here, there are,” he said, adding that hats are to be removed upon entering his dojo, and that all students bow to their sensei, or teacher, before and after receiving their instruction in jujitsu, a Japanese martial art focused on defeating an armed opponent using one’s body and wits.

After receiving numerous emails about the influence that Lovering has had on so many Bellmorites and Merokeans through his instruction, it was apparent to us that the community-minded sensei deserved to be named the Bellmore Herald Life’s 2016 Person of the Year.

In addition to his work in martial arts, Lovering served as president of the Bellmore Chamber of Commerce from 1998 to 2001, after he was its vice president. During that time he played a key role in creating the Bellmore Family Street Festival, which is sponsored by the chamber each year.

Among those with whom he worked closely on the festival was Gary Hudes, owner of Gennaro Jewelers, who is now a Town of Hempstead councilman. The festival, which annually attracts more than 100,000 visitors, quickly became one of Nassau County’s largest fairs.

In the mid- to late 1990s, Bellmore’s central commerce zone, around the Long Island Rail Road station on Sunrise Highway, was dying, with boarded-up shops and litter-strewn streets. The street festival was key to revitalizing the district, which now boasts an array of eclectic shops and eateries and is often cited by municipal planners as a prime example of downtown revitalization.

The festival “is not about getting people to buy things on that one particular day,” said Lovering, who remains an active member of the chamber. “It’s about letting people know what businesses are here and making Bellmore a destination.”

He is also a past president of the Bellmore Village Merchants Association, and was Bellmore’s Small Businessperson of the Year in 1997. He has been awarded numerous citations and awards for his service to the community –– in particular, for his service to children.

Subhed: Like a second father

Lovering is a master of self-defense, and his goal, he said, is to pass his skills –– and the self-confidence that comes with the ability to defend oneself –– to the next generation.

Indeed, his skills are widely known throughout the metropolitan area. He has served as a bodyguard for News Corp CEO Rupert Murdoch, and taught defense to members of the Nassau County Police Department, the county Department of Corrections, the New York City Police Department, the FBI, the New York State Unified Court System and the U.S. Marshals Service.

Lovering is also a cancer survivor, having undergone surgery for prostate cancer in 2004. In 2006 he attended the Lance Armstrong Foundation’s LiveStrong Summit in Austin, Texas, where he was one of 750 people chosen from over 25,000 applicants to train as an advocate for cancer survivors, according to Eileen Benze, a former student and now a sensei at Goshinkan Dojo, who describes Lovering as “a natural teacher” who has cultivated a sense of community at his dojo.

Lovering himself is reluctant to speak of such accomplishments, though. He returns always to his greatest love –– teaching young people.

His simple credo and firm instruction have paid off, according to his former charges, many of whom say they will always remain students of “Sensei Jeff.”

Thomas Osborne began studying under Lovering in junior high school in 1990 — which he described as a tough time. Under the tutelage of Lovering, whom he described as his “second father,” Osborne learned the tools to succeed, and today is a school administrator in Amherst, Mass.

“Sensei Jeff provided me with advice, support and guidance — he does still to this day, and I would certainly, without a doubt, not be where I am without him,” Osborne said. “I would name him as the most influential teacher of my entire life, and it’s not even close. I feel deeply privileged and honored to be able to call myself his student. I will always be his student throughout my life.”

Katie Carroll, who began training with Lovering when she was 10, also described him as a second father, and said that many students have not only earned their belts under him, but also sent their children to him. Carroll now works as a head instructor at Goshinkan Dojo.

“Jeff treats each and every single person who enters the dojo doors as family,” she said. “I could not imagine how my life would be without him in it. He has taught me that I am capable of anything that I put my mind to. He is always in my corner and rooting for me in everything that I do.”

Subhed: Principles of respect

Lovering said that his training boils down to three simple principles: respect for oneself, respect for others and responsibility for one’s actions. “In here, manners matter,” he said. “They are part of what we do in here every day.”

This credo was instilled in him back in 1975, when he began his own training at Rensei Dojo in Baldwin. It soon moved to Merrick, where it was called The Silent Flute.

In six years, he earned the rank of Sho-dan, first-degree black belt, and in 1983, he opened his own dojo, called Defense Concepts, in a space rented at the American Legion hall in Bellmore.

Lovering said that the Japanese flag and insignias that are part of operating a dojo were “a bit of a challenge,” for obvious reasons in an American Legion hall with members who were World War II veterans. Eventually, though, he adopted an American flag, which he still flies at his Merrick Avenue dojo, and he brings out the Japanese regalia on certain occasions, always remembering the roots of the martial arts.

Beyond respect for others, much of the respect for oneself comes from the knowledge of how to defend oneself, according to Lovering. Thus, a big part of his program boosts students’ self-confidence by teaching them the skills necessary to disarm a threat, such as an armed attacker.

Charles Solon, who studied under Lovering and now has a 30-year-old son also training with him, said that he chiefly teaches students peaceful means of evading physical confrontations. “Walk away or talk away –– that’s what he teaches children,” Solon said. “And they all seem to stay. We all stay. He’s just a special man when it comes to his students.”

Carlos Pandullo began training with Lovering when he was 5, in 1995. Now one of Lovering’s black belts, Pandullo said he also credits his sensei with making him the man he is today.

“Sensei Jeff has … given me every opportunity to succeed and grow,” he said. “Off the mat, he has counseled me many times, helping me through difficult times and decisions. Although these are my personal experiences, there is no question that he has treated everyone who has walked through the dojo door the same way.”