Do You Want an Angel or a Devil?

Who do you want to end up with?

Angel vs. Devil. The continual battle…

Well, not quite to that extent, but the empirical premise holds true.  More accurately in this case, for us guys anyway, the party girl vs. the nice girl. For you ladies out there, the bad boy vs. the nice guy who treats you well.

I’ve had a number of conversations with friends on the topic over the last several years. The yield of those conversations, to an extent has surprised me.

Time to time, a friend of mine has told me that they’d like to end up with the bad boy or the party girl. This is kind of perplexing to me, frankly. I mean, the behaviors that go with those types of personalities aren’t exactly conducive to having a productive and successful marriage.

Going out and getting wasted, flirting with other people “just for fun,” the potential of having an affair, acting selfish in a variety of ways, etc. all are traits that to one extent or another go along with the bad boys and the party girls. How that lends itself to being an element of a positive and healthy relationship, well, I don’t understand.

And then there’s the nice girls and the nice guys who treat women well. They keep their behavior on the appropriate side of the line and behave toward their partners in a terrific way and are respectful, etc. They’re sweet and caring and genuinely care about their relationships and the person who’s in it with them.

Most of the time though when I’ve had these conversations with friends, they’ve gone with the “logical” answer, so to speak. Usually, they’ve said that they’ll go out with them, but just for some fun and not for something serious. Since as they’ve said, you don’t marry the bad boy or the party girl. And when actually considering a partner for life, they want the nice guy or nice girl.

Makes sense, right?

Now don’t get me wrong, I know it’s not that straight forward and clear cut all of the time.

It would be nice if it was though, wouldn’t it?

 That however, is not the reality of how things work so… Let’s deal in reality. There are two sides to every story and it’s no different in this instance. Most of the time that is accurate as to what’s beneficial to helping to create a productive and successful relationship. But, you just never know what can sometimes work with each unique pairing of people, and from time to time things still have a way of working out.

That is, of course, the rarity, and not the norm. And I tend to play the statistics most of the time and let that guide my decision making process usually… and also tend to allow logic and reason to be the rationale I abide by. So, I’m in the camp of people who looks for the nice and kind girls to build a relationship with and eventually settle down with. Plus, I don’t do well with the other type of personality being in play in someone I’m dating.

 Besides, we’ve all got mothers to answer to…

 ’All is fair in love and war’ – what a contemptible lie!”– Robert Heinlein

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