HAFTR students prep for bar & bat mitzvahs

Hebrew Academy of the Five Towns and Rockaway sixth grade girls and seventh grade boys are readying for a busy time: attending and/or taking part in each other’s bar and bat mitzvah celebrations.

Being a new rite of passage there is much to learn. How do they conduct themselves when they attend such an event? What is socially acceptable? What is the proper way to greet the honorees? What if they drop food on the floor accidentally? What if their cell phones ring during a speech? How to act like a mensch or respectable young lady?

To help the youngsters along, HAFTR Middle School held bar mitzvah and bat mitzvah workshops. RSVPs were required, along with party attire and most importantly — proper conduct. Students learned about the festivities and fun and what is expected of them.

The girls shared the joy with their mothers or another woman in their family, and the boys invited their fathers or another male family member.

The girls learned about the mitzvah of baking challah along with Rebezzin Sori Teitelbaum and the spiritual aspects of becoming a bat mitzvah with Nechama Landau. The boys, practiced their haftorah, the portion of the Torah they will read while praying in the school’s Beit Midrash with the support of HAFTR’s rabbis.

“These programs have become an integral part of HAFTR’s Middle School experience as our students prepare for one of the most exciting and important times of their lives -— becoming a bar or bat mitzvah,” said middle school Principal Joshua Gold.

From putting a used dish on the table to speaking with the coat check person, students learned about respect and how to make the party extra special for their hosts and families.

“It is important to make sure our students not only know the proper decorum and behavior at a bar or bat mitzvah, but we also want them to feel comfortable that they know what to do at these affairs,” said Ari Solomon, HAFTR’s Executive Director.

One of the best lessons was when eighth grade volunteers and faculty called or texted the cell phones of a few students to learn if they would be distracted during the speeches. A few learned that it is easy to make that mistake and not to respond unless it is an emergency, (which is rare). This was an excellent lesson in self-control and respect for the honorees.