Stacy Ross and her brother, Michael Smith, who have carved out impressive careers as an author/mental health advocate and TV director, respectively, were the guest speakers during Human Relations Day at their alma mater, Lynbrook High School on Feb. 12.
The Student Government Club, which teacher Nicole DiBenedetto advises, invited the siblings to address the school’s juniors and seniors. A decade ago, DiBenedetto ran Human Relations Day as a student, and now the club is in charge of planning the event.
“The goal of the day is to enlighten and motivate students, showing people’s stories and being able to emphasize with them,” DiBenedetto, a 2016 graduate who began teaching social studies and AP U.S. history at the high school three years ago, said.
As a 1984 LHS graduate, Ross’s talk was called “Searching for Slippers: an LHS Coming of Age Story.”
“Searching for Slippers: One Mom’s Coming of Age Story” is the title of her memoir, which is about raising a child with borderline personality disorder. Ross said she decided on the title because she was always waiting for the other shoe to drop, moving from one crisis to another while raising a child with the disorder.
“I wasn’t naive enough to think the shoes would never drop, that’s part of adulthood, but I wanted them to be a little lighter, like slippers,” Ross said.
“Through that book, I’ve become a mental health advocate. By telling my story, I hope to inspire others to do the same, and hopefully normalize the mental health conversation and reduce stigma.”
She recounted her story, the things she learned along the way that helps her cope when life throws her curveballs, and lessons that could be applied to many areas of struggle for teens.
“It is hard to raise a child with a serious mental illness, but through coping skills, I learned along the way,” Ross said. “I saw that it was possible not only to survive but to thrive.”
A 1989 LHS graduate, Smith has been the director of the television shows “Manifest,” “Law & Order: SVU,” and “Suits.”
Smith, who first spoke at Lynbrook High School’s Career Day four years ago, said he has always dreamed of directing and producing shows. Whether it was at home watching movies with his dad, or going to the Lynbrook Movie Theater with friends, he’s always had a love for television.
After attending the University of Michigan, Smith had been accepted into the Director’s Guild of America training — which admits only five to seven New York-based students per year — and he served 15 years as an assistant director, working on episodes of “Law & Order” and “The Sopranos.”
“I got my first opportunity to direct an episode of ‘Law & Order: Criminal Intent’ in 2007, and have been directing and producing television ever since, directing close to 90 episodes and producing around 150 episodes of TV,” Smith said.
Ross said that during her talk, the students were very receptive and polite, listening and asking questions respectfully. And there was a sweet gesture that reminded her of the ever-lasting connection that Lynbrook High School inspires.
“The Italian Club sponsored ‘Flowers for a Friend,’ and a teacher I recognized, Mr. Leonard Bruno, head of the language department, sat in on my talk and actually sent me a flower to bring to my son, Fin, the subject of my memoir,” Ross said. “It was so heartwarming. The best thing about Lynbrook is once you belong, you always belong.”
Smith said he was happy to speak alongside his sister, teaching the juniors and seniors about what goes into being a director and producing a single TV episode.
“I taught them about the eight days of prep, eight days of shooting, and five days of editing for each episode,” he said. “The process of getting a script, casting, scouting and pre-production, how I rehearse with the actors and camera, and then how I edit the content to be ready for television five or six weeks after filming concludes.”
The students were interested and inquisitive, especially when Smith showed them clips from season three, episode four of “Manifest” that he directed.
“I look forward to going back and speaking to them whenever I can,” he said.
“Mike has spoken for us before, and we always love to have him,” DiBenedetto said. “Then I read Stacy’s book and thought she was the perfect person to speak to the whole school. The students can really relate to the honesty and coping mechanisms she talks about.”
Ross and Smith grew up in Lynbrook, with their parents Bruce and Beth Smith, who taught at Marion Street Elementary School for nearly 30 years. They lived on Fenton Place, near Lynbrook South Middle School, which both siblings attended. Both Ross and Smith now live in New Jersey.
Growing up in the village, Smith said the area inspired him to raise his family in a similar atmosphere.
“My wife and I found a small town called Springfield, that is similar to Lynbrook in size, high school structure, and a nice place to raise kids,” Smith said. “Lynbrook left a lasting impression on me to find a similar town to raise a family in.”
“I had an amazing high school experience at Lynbrook,” Ross said. “It wasn’t until I got out and went to Cornell University that I realized not everyone has that type of high school experience. I cherish it more as I get older.”
Ross was an active member of her graduating class, a cheerleader for four years and member of the prom and yearbook committees.
“We had our 40th reunion in Rockville Centre in 2024, and we realized that we all took different paths, but came back together to the community we will always be a part of,” she said.
