Carmela Giovanna Tomaino Lage, a longtime Merrick resident known for her deep community involvement, advocacy for children with disabilities and devotion to family, died May 4, 2026. She was 91.
Born Sept. 22, 1934, in Brooklyn, Lage later moved to Merrick, where she lived for more than 60 years and became a familiar and active presence in civic and charitable life.
She met her husband, A.G. Lage, in Brooklyn, and the two married shortly after. Together they raised their daughter, Michelle, born in 1958, and their son, John, born in 1961. Following Michelle’s diagnosis with cerebral palsy, the family relocated to Nassau County so she could receive services through what is now the United Cerebral Palsy Center in Roosevelt.
Family friend and longtime collaborator Julie Marchesella said Lage’s commitment to her daughter’s care helped shape an entire community network of support.
“The center became the place for many, many children who have grown into adulthood and have been taken care of at the CP center in Roosevelt,” Marchesella said. “It would not be there if it were not for the fact that her daughter, Michelle, was palsied and needed a place to be.”
In Merrick, Lage became widely known through her work with Welcome Wagon, where she greeted new residents and built relationships with local business owners that later fueled extensive fundraising efforts.
“Once she got into Welcome Wagon and she started meeting people and other business owners, she would get us all involved with United Cerebral Palsy and fundraising,” Marchesella said. “She was their greatest fundraiser.”
Marchesella, who said she met Lage through her own business more than three decades ago, described a friendship that evolved into something closer to family.
“We became fast friends, and over the years we are more family than friends,” she said. “She was very concerned that there would be someone who cared so much about children that they would carry on in her footsteps.”
Lage was also deeply involved in community events alongside her husband, including longstanding service at local festivals where the couple worked side by side at ticket booths and organizational committees.
“They were a team. Everything they did was a team effort,” Marchesella said. “Carmela was very astute. She attended every single meeting, never missed a meeting.”
Through Welcome Wagon, Lage helped connect local businesses to fundraising efforts, encouraging donations such as gift baskets, restaurant certificates and merchandise that were raffled to support charitable causes.
“She would visit all of us, walk down the street and visit all of us,” Marchesella said. “That gave them an opportunity to advertise locally, and it gave her an opportunity to bring the community together.”
Lage also served on the board of United Cerebral Palsy and remained active in auxiliary efforts and fashion shows supporting the organization for decades.
Her daughter-in-law, Robin Lage, said Carmela’s presence and influence left a lasting impression on everyone around her.
“You just knew that when she walked in the room, she was somebody,” Robin Lage said. “She was phenomenal. She loved big. Everything she did, she did well.”
Robin Lage also reflected on the personal impact Carmela had on her family.
“I am a better person because she was in my life,” she said.
In Merrick, Lage was recognized for her civic contributions, including being named “Woman of the Year” by the Merrick Chamber of Commerce.
She is survived by her children, Michelle and John; four grandchildren, Jacqueline, Christina, John Jr. and Jordan; and five great-grandchildren, Avery, Warren, Will, Charlotte and Isaac.
Donations in her memory may be made to the United Cerebral Palsy Center in Roosevelt, a cause that remained central to her life’s work.
