Dr. Norman Amer is dead at 81

“He was born in a log cabin,” was Dr. Scott Amer’s response to the question of where his father grew up, and that answer helps explain the legacy of love and humor that, by all accounts, Dr. Norman Amer of Woodmere left his four children and dozen grandchildren when he died on Sept. 13.

He was 81.

That love extended not only to his family — he was caring for his wife of 57 years, Jo, who suffers from Alzheimer’s disease — but to his cardiology and thoracic surgery patients as well as the many causes, issues and organizations he supported.

“He was cheap with himself and unbelievably generous with everyone else,” said Scott, a pediatric dentist. “He was a throwback; they don’t make people like him anymore. He helped take care of my mom. It is that dedication and generosity I will remember.”

Born in the Bronx on Sept. 2, 1930, Norman Amer attended DeWitt Clinton High School and graduated at age 16, according to Scott. At the University of Michigan, he helped establish a fraternity and became a lifelong Wolverines fan, keeping in touch with his Michigan buddies over the years.

After three years at Jefferson Medical College in Philadelphia, Amer returned to New York. In the summer of 1952, he met Jo Paxin, of Scarsdale, at a dance in Lido Beach. The poor boy from the Bronx and the girl from the upscale suburb hit it off and were married on June 16, 1954.

“She was the woman behind the man, but he put her first,” said Scott, whose nickname for his parents was NoJo.

Scott was born a year later, and calls from the U.S. Army led the new family to move to Chicago and then Omaha, Neb., where another son, Jeffrey, now a pediatrician, was born. In 1959, a daughter, Wendy, was born, and Lori followed four years later. Both now live in Scarsdale.

Affiliated with several area hospitals during his career, Dr. Amer was the chief of surgery at Kings County Hospital, where Dr. Mel Young of Lawrence was an intern more than 40 years ago. Young remembers Amer as a friend and colleague, a gifted surgeon who took pride in his work and caring for his patients. The two became tennis partners, and Young came to know Amer as a devoted husband, father and grandfather.

“I will miss his can-do spirit, good values and sense of humor, not to mention his surgical expertise and sound clinical judgment,” said Young, who called Amer a unique man who was “very philanthropic and eschewed flashy cars in favor of championing causes such as the United Jewish Appeal, the Anti-Defamation League and women’s groups with his wife, Jo.”

Amer’s involvement in those causes and many more, along with Jo, is how Binnie Stein will remember Amer. She recalls his help in establishing the Five Towns Jewish Council in 1977 and the Adult Institute of Jewish Studies through the Jewish Council, chairing festivals, reaching out to community members in need and serving on Congregation Sons of Israel in Woodmere’s board for more than 40 years.

“I adored him for what he did,” said Stein, a longtime member of the Hadassah-Lailah chapter of Woodmere. “I was in his house many times; it was a delight. He was funny and a great doctor. Anything that helped Israel, he was there and got involved.”

Though he was honored by many organizations for his efforts, and was named a Herald Person of the Year, according to those who knew him, Amer never lost sight of what was important in his life. “He loved and treated his patients regardless of their ability to pay,” said Scott. “He would take a Greek salad for payment.”

The Amers sat shiva in family homes in Hewlett, Syosset and Scarsdale. Amer was interred at Mt. Ararat Cemetery, alongside his father, mother, sister and brother-in-law. The family asks that friends remember him by donating a pint of blood in his or a loved one’s memory.