From helpless to self reliant

On Saturday my son, Matthew, now 18, will graduate from St. John the Baptist High School at the Tilles Center on the campus of LIU Post.
A milestone in his life for sure, but for my wife, Christine, and me as well.
When standing in line at the post office a few months ago, I saw a baby boy held by his mother. I couldn’t help but think back to when Matt was first born.
It was the first time I truly held a baby. Only then does one begin to understand how dependent they are. Needing to be fed, changed and watched constantly.
Being my first child, I took great pride in making sure I did as much as possible. 

When Matt began to talk, we did not dumb down our verbal communication, which prompted a 4-year-old Matt to ask his father, “Are those men having a conversation?” when he saw two men talking. 
Throughout the years Matt and I spent many hours together driving to school, spending the better part of many Saturdays going to and fro and when he played high school ice hockey for three seasons, we drove together to just about every practice and game. During that time was when I learned about my son, his thoughts, dreams and the pressures he felt.
I also watched him grow from a shy boy who had to be pushed by his elementary school principal to introduce himself to the young man DJing a school dance to a confident leader who learned not only how to DJ a party, but run his own business and work for others.
When we challenged him to improve his grades — albeit with the carrot that he wouldn’t get his driver’s license — Matthew responded.
When he was required to earn a passing mark on a college placement test, he once again answered the challenge and earned admission to John Jay College.
His work ethic is second to none, and my wife and I hope he continues to apply it as he faces new challenges and prepares for a career.
The child I was once held in my hands has progressed from dependency to being independent.